You need to grow up! Accept your past, and move forward to a brighter future.
Yes, life FUCKIN sucks, and I understand you have some issues, but so does everybody else.
For the past 6 years I have been loathing in self-pity and feeling sorry myself and you know what? It has gotten me nowhere but alcoholism and more brokenness.
You are a pretty girl, smart and loving, but you need to give up what has happened to you. Stop making excuses, and start demanding the love you so eagerly desire.
I watch you and James, and it’s sad to say that you two are both weak. You both are afraid of commitment. You both are living in fear, I can smell it.
You will never read this, but I am praying for you and James. I pray that you and James commit to each other.